Wednesday was a trip; I got four hours’ sleep on Tuesday night, and had to work for four hours from eight to noon… when I got out of work, it was raining, so I decided to explore the strip mall around Tully’s. There is a lovely little giftshop there which I liked quite a bit; a cheap, mostly yummy sub shop, and a rather depressing beauty salon. The beauty salon near our house has lots of organic products, young, pretty, knowledgeable employees, and is brightly lit and clean. This one had employees in their forties who were baring their midriffs, dying their hair EXTREME shades of blonde, and seemed to be maybe a little retarded. Anyway, regardless of their knowledgelessness, I bought some blonde-formula shampoo and a comb…. anyway, when I got out from my little trip, it was raining even harder than it had been before… I ran over to the bus stop just in time to see my bus leave, and with sinking dread in my heart, waited a half-hour for the next one. That bus only takes me to the bus stop which is two and a half miles from my house, from which there is no bus which will take me nearer. GRRrrr. So I had to walk that home in the driving, pouring rain. On the upside, I found a slightly-busted umbrella behind the dumpster at the bus stop, and it made the journey doable.

I got home to find us throwing weapons at Iraq, and after Chemistry class, went to an evening which was supposed to be for the Lenten series on “How to Pray”, but Fr. Steve had changed what he was going to talk about from… I don’t remember, something about some form of prayer, to, How to pray in times of war. It was almost a little funny, because of some of the prayers people used to pray… like “confound the devices of our enemies!” Anyway, it was a good meeting, we actually got into some pretty heavy theological discussion about the concept of the Just War, and how to ask God for stuff, and it was really good. And we did pray, a lot.

Yesterday was just… incredibly stressful, for personal reasons. I don’t think there’s anything else to say about the day.

Today, got up at six again… did Logic class, fell asleep towards the end, woke up ten minutes after, kicked myself for missing it, got up, did house stuff, went to work… came home, ate dinner. Dad made tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches… yummy comfort food

And that is my boring life! I also worked on this song yesterday. It is complicated, and it’s difficult to write music for it, because it does not have a regular chorus or anything like that; but I enjoy the challenge. It is sort of freer and purer than a “regular” song might be.

“In the Meantime”

“Maybe one day…” you sighed
“In the meantime, don’t be lonely, don’t pine,
don’t let it dim your eye, don’t whine,” and I should
not have let them know, only, how would I hide?
I want to see you at sunrise and sunset;
everyone knows I see you in my dreams.
And do not think I should ever turn away…
You’re not a mirror, but the dawn, and
what’s as plain on me as the dawn on the day is the
love that I cannot dim or brush away…
It does not dim my eye, I will not pine…
but now the night is no meantime until forever goes by.
And so it lays beside me as I lie…
and the lake grows up inside me
from the spring that God has planted
and refills by his own hand
as I coldly dream of snow endlessly layering the hillside.

You told me not to keep my love for you,
but like a child she comes back into my arms.
And she’s forever young, forever needs my care;
there is no other I could ever want near.
So do not laugh at my inexperience;
I am not here for joy or even grace.
Would you frown upon my persistence?
I am not here for a day, or an hour, or forever;
I am here for you.
Come, love, our mouths were not made to swallow death;
mortal sadness can be beautiful, but it only thrives in night.
When day is come, all is forgiven;
do not be weighed by the words that were spoken before.
Let God pepper our daytime with laughter,
and when we reach the water on the beach
I’ll wash the salt from your wounds.
We may not last forever,
but we are not yet brought to any sure end.

I want to be at the ends of your fingers
as you ink out your thoughts
in the broad scrawl your father taught you.
I want to be caught in the edges of your eyes,
the place that goes to hide when you smile,
so I can see your inner joy unfold and bloom.
Will you not let me into you? I will tell you where you are:
you are my palms when I am praying,
and my feet when I walk near the water.
You are whispering calms into my ears when thunder drops upon me,
and you are painted in broken rain across my pale brow.
Don’t hold us back; I am not easily cast aside.
Don’t you see, there, the star that keeps the dawn alive?
It sings her to wake, and to sleep again,
it stretches my wings to draw peace within,
and gracefully tells me that all is not lost;
only those dreams that could never come true.
And I do not fight the changing colors of my soul,
because I have found a home in the forest by your road.

Barista Goddess say: “Friends don’t let friends drink Starbucks.”

So, I had a pretty strange (mostly good-strange) weekend. On Friday, I worked, and not much interesting happened, except two things: one, Brian Basset came into our store! He’s the guy who writes/draws “Adam@Home” and “Red and Rover” (comic strips), and since we are totally addicted to those strips, it was kind of cool to meet him. Plus, if you ever have read “Adam”, you know that he’s really REALLY into his coffee, so it was… like… an honor to get Brian Basset coffee Two, my co-worker (Ian) and I had a really weird — serious — conversation all day long, talking (among other things) about his bad habits of smoking, drinking, and swearing. It was rather illuminating, in that he’s a bright guy (sort of) with bad ideas. I’d also brought my Bible to work, and left it on the counter next to the sink so I could read it when there were no customers in. Ian thought this was *really* interesting, and said that he’d been Catholic for a little while because he’d been afraid of going to Hell… then he picked up my Bible and started reading Revelations, and spent a good hour or so at it. He is a strange, strange person, and I haven’t quite decided yet whether his company completely repulses me or not.

Friday *night*, we had a Movie Night, so lots of people came over to our house and we watched “The Secret of Roan Inish” and “Tuck Everlasting”. I’ve seen “Secret” before, and yah, it’s really good, but “Tuck Everlasting” was corny, corny, corny. The protagonist is a poutier, whimpier, not-as-spunky version of Helena Bonham Carter from “Room with a View”, and the male lead is so much of a pretty-boy male actor that he actually *looks* (no, a lot) like a girl. When he first came on screen, Mary and I were very confused, and kept debating internally on his gender. Anyway, partyway through one of these movies…

My brother walked in! Ha! I guess he and Mom have been plotting for some time to bring him up herewards for Spring Break, but, mmm, they didn’t tell the rest of us Anyway, though, GOOD surprise, and it’s AWESOME to see him again. We’ve got big plans to play catch, eat sushi, and watch “Office Space” while he’s home this week.

And then, Saturday night, I went out with Juliana, Ian, and a smattering of other people… we hung out at Ian’s house for a while, had lots of yummy food, and then went to see “Jet City Improv” at the Ethnic somethingorother Theatre which is down in Seattle on the UW Campus, run by UW people. It was a really funny show — I always enjoy improv, and they were really good at it — and I fully expected to pee my pants several times during the proceedings, because I was laughing so hard.

Sunday morning, Cynthia preached a really good sermon… really personal and touching, and almost as much a witness talk as a sermon… anyway it was good, and I know it was hard for her; that’s why it meant so much. I thought it was fitting that, having done that for the sermon, she then went on to lead the Youth Group discussion about “Courage”, which is based on Esther. This combined with seeing “Signs” and the church reading being the one about Abraham and Isaac made me think a lot about children, about giving up children, Jesus’ sacrifice… all these things I’m supposed to think about during Lent, anyway.

I’m also doing this thing (maybe I already mentioned it here… or maybe not…) where I’m collecting the favorite Bible verses of my friends, and highlighting them in my Bible, and writing the person’s name next to it. This is going along pretty well, because I’ve talked to a bunch of people at islas and youth group and stuff, and so I’ve got lots of names in there now. It’s fun, it’s like a little Biblical snapshot of someone’s personality to see what they love. I also think it’s fascinating that everyone in my family seems to like John best out of the books of the Bible. Dad really likes a bunch of the OT stories, and Mary likes Ruth (so do I…), but John pretty much wins all contests for Good Writing Biblically.

So today, I get to go to work for six and a half hours, and then go straight to the meeting for planning Holy Week, which will doubtless take an hour or two more… ehhh. I am excited for it, because I like Holy Week services, but I’m also dreading the fact that I won’t get any dinner, and wishing Monday were just a little shorter. Anyway, I am just a big bundle of complaint. I really shouldn’t complain, because I’m REALLY lucky to have a job in today’s economy, and I DO like planning Holy Week, and dinner is only just this one stupid little meal, anyway.

Barista Goddess say: “Person who dreams that her father quotes ‘Snatch’ to her as worldly-wise advice needs to stop dropping so much acid in her sleep.”

Got this one in the mail today, and since it has a lot of questions that I’ve never seen before on surveys, I thought I’d give it a whirl.

1. What color are your kitchen plates? They’re pure white Corelle plates.

2. What book are you reading now? “War and Peace” and “War in Heaven”. Strangely, these combined with the world condition have put war on my braine.

3. What’s on your mouspad? Gross staines… dust… it’s gray and has a faded “Suncom” emblem on it. Oh, and my mouse. I used to have one that was an ouija board, but that was for the Amiga, and I don’t know where that one is now.

4. Favorite board game? Hmm, Trivial Pursuit, I think. Is Boggle a board game? That, too. Oh, and Take Two, which is technically not a *board* game, but it uses Scrabble pieces. Ya, board games

5. Favorite magazine? National Geographic. Pretty pictures. I won a free year of YM, though, so I get that in the mail too. And sometimes I buy Vogue. Yes, behold my valgirlity.

6. Favorite smell? Garlic, onions, ratatouille… cookies baking, fresh cut grass, books, pianos, and organs… but absolutely #1 favorite smell is the pre-described Mt. Rainier smell, consisting of some mixture of pine, berries, dirt, and ferns. And sort of hot.

7. Least favorite smell? Vomit and people who don’t bathe. There was this guy who used to go to our church who smelled really really awful…

8. What is the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning? Turn on computer, then pee.

9. Favorite color? Green

10. Least favorite color? Probably the color of the drapes in our last house. Dirty, muted orangey… ugh. Only a decade as dull as the 70s could give birth to a color so hideous…

11. How many rings before you answer the phone? Well, one at least, unless I psychically percieve that I am about to recieve a call, and answer the phone *before* it actually rings. Which has happened before.

12. Future child’s name? Ruth or William, maybe.

13. What is most important in life? God, love, truth, beauty. I’m a Christian Bohemian

14. Chocolate or vanilla? For ice cream, vanilla; for anything else, chocolate.

15. Do you like to drive fast? Yeah, I drive pretty crazily on those racing video games. I don’t drive otherwise, though.

16. Do you sleep with a stuffed animal? Yes, Trevor…

17. Do you like storms? I *love* storms. Especially East-coast storms.

18. What type was your first car? A little broken-down rusty red compact volvo. And when I say little, I mean the length from my knuckle to the end of my fingernail.

19. If you could meet one person dead or alive, who would it be? John, the disciple whom Jesus loved

20. Favorite alcoholic drink? Ummmmmm… red wine?

21. What is your sign and your birthday? Aquarius, 2/3/85.

22. Do you eat the stems of broccoli? Yes, I down every last nibble of hearty broccolic goodness.

23. If you could have any job what would it be? Pirate priest-philosopher rock star. Yeah, you’re jealous.

24. If you could have any color hair, what would it be? I like the color it is now, but I wish it were a little more uniformly colored. Right now it’s dark in back and at the roots and light in front, and it looks DORKY.

25. Have you ever been in love? Mm-hm.

26. Is the glass half full or half empty? It’s half a glass. Is it being poured into or being drunk from? So long as it’s full of a) fizzy water, b) orange juice, or c) a coffee or chocolate beverage of some sort, I don’t care.

27. Favorite movies? Lawrence of Arabia; Witness; the Muppet Movie; the Princess Bride; Mansfield Park… and about ten thousand others. I love movies.

28. Do you type with your fingers on the right keys? Yeah, pretty much, I think.

29. What lives under your bed? Something sticky…

30. What is your favorite number? 12.

31. Favorite sports to watch? Baseball; gymnastics, figure skating.

32. What is your single biggest fear? Absence of God.

33. Favorite TV shows? Of the past: Moonlighting, X-Files, Covington Cross, Remington Steele, Babylon 5, Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. And it was not a good show, but I still have a soft spot for Reboot. Current: The Simpsons, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel, Alias. Plus we seem to be watching a lot of Jeopardy lately

34. Ketchup or mustard? On eggs or hash browns, ketchup is amazing… otherwise, mustard.

35. Hamburgers or hotdogs? This is carnivorism. I’m vegetarian!

36. Favorite soft drink? Ummmmmm probably root beer or cream soda. And we call it “pop” here.

37. The best places you have ever been? Camp Robbinswold, canoeing on Hood Canal; Montauk (yummm ocean); Mt. Rainier; Colorado (where the Aherns’ cabin is…); and my two local “spots”: the place down right on the corner where I can look out over Sammammish lake and the mountains (perfect place to see the sunrise, I add) and where the eagle lives; and the bench in Weowna park which is surrounded by trees and is so yogic somehow

38. What screen saver is on your computer right now? I don’t use a screen saver, I just put my computer to sleep when I’m not using it.

39. What is your favorite fast food place? Subway.

40. Favorite saying? Barista Goddess say: “Surveys fun: informative yet trivial. Also, twinkie points to Barista who give Barista Goddess ride home so Barista Goddess not have to walk home in the rain.”